The Great Escape


So my depression has crept up on me again in the past few days.  I am in that weird limbo situation where it’s cancelled out my anxiety and I am unable to care about everything that my body is screaming to at me to care about and I just cannot see any reason to get out of bed.

So today I forced myself to.

I had no lectures today, and I lay in bed until 12pm, marathoning Criminal Minds and trying to snap out of this fog.  I would sit up, swing my legs over the side, and just flop back down because I’m just so heavy.

I mean, physically I’m disgusting anyway but mentally…

My head feels so full and it just pulls me down and why should I get up???

So it got to a point where once I was sitting up, I managed to grab my dry shampoo and spray the hell out of my hair before lying back down.  I mean, that gave it some time to set in, right?

Then I got changed, one item of clothing at a time.

Next I managed to put on my shoes, grab my sponge bag, and make it to the bathroom.

My next step was to leave the house, which I did, and caught the bus into town.  At this point I was so tired again that I went to Costa and fuelled up with a mocha because I love hot chocolate and coffee and their marriage is delicious.

Pit stops. That’s the key.

I made short trips all day, shop to shop, seat to seat.  Bus home.  Collapse on bed.

But I got out of my room, right?

I made it.

Pit stop to pit stop.

Don’t over exert.

I need to travel and just see new places because I am so tired of this place, of this costume, of everything.

Hope everyone’s ok out there.


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